Domestic Violence

Momna Shahid

Why aren’t you leaving a relationship that is costing you the world and everything it contains?

Domestic violence is a term used to describe an intimate relationship in which a person controls and/or dominate their significant other authoritatively. Domestic violence may be physical, emotional and sexual. According to a study published by WHO (2005), following indicators are usually asked to identify the intensity of domestic violence occurred:

Since the beginning of relationship, does your partner ever:

1. Thrown something at you, slapped you or did anything that could hurt you?
2. Shoved or pushed you.
3. Hit you with a clenched fist or similar action that hurt you.
4. Dragged you, kicked or beat you up.
5. Burnt your skin in any way or chocked you on purpose.
6. Used or threatened you with knife gun or any other weapon.
   
   

By using the above mentioned questions as a reference point, domestic violence was measured.  

Domestic violence has now become a global issue. It has widely spread geographically and the dangerous thing is that it is becoming a new normal. It deeply impacts on mental and physical health of women as well as children. It’s really a need of time to talk about such issues expressively.

“The more that we choose not to talk about
domestic violence, the more we shy away
from the issue, the more we lose.”  
(Russell Wilson)

There is a high proportion of women according to the survey of World Health Organization reported domestic violence cases. According to studies the intimate partner’s violence is reported as in the range of 30% to 79% in Pakistan. 34% women in Karachi reported physical abuse by their husbands.

Causes of domestic violence:

There are some major factors that make women prone to domestic violence such as low empowerment, misuse of women in the name of honor, traditional norms, low education, traditional dowry system in our society etc. Clearly Pakistan is the male dominant and/or male patriarchal cultured country, men have all the privileges and decision rights. They do not value female’s opinion at all. Disagreements and daily conflicts between husband and wife also leads to domestic violence. Financial instability is also a major cause of domestic violence. Every third women in Pakistan has no clue about their rights because of illiteracy.

Domestic violence – a choice by the abuser:

Contrary to popular belief that domestic violence happens because the abuser loses control, it doesn’t happen because of that. Domestic violence is a direct result of an abuser tries to gain control instead of losing it. Culprits use a variety of tactics to make sure, they in control (Smith & Segal, 2019). Some of them are:

1. Dominance
2. Humiliation
3. Isolation
4. Threats
5. Intimidation                                                                                                                                          

In between the abuse cycle, the loving gestures of the abuser makes it hard for the one being abused to leave the situation or report it to the police.

Psychological and physical effects of Domestic

Violence:
From the psychological perspective violence contains all the behaviors such as humiliation, fear, talking about weaknesses of the woman in front of family and friends, dominating every action of a woman, degrading, making her feel useless, ignoring woman’s emotions and feelings, comparing with other women etc. It is the worst kind of a violence which leads woman to mental retardation, chronic depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, suicidal thoughts, lowers her self-esteem and self-confidence. Physical violence is the most obvious kind of a violence. It includes slapping, kicking, pulling hair of a woman, dragging on the ground etc which directly effects the body and cause bruises, scars, disabilities and serious injuries. Children’s mental and physical health are at greater risk. They experience and witness the violence within the family. Mostly children living in such households are more likely to be abused and neglected which effects their personality, confidence and academic record.

1. WHY WOMEN STAY IN DOMESTICALLY VIOLENT RELATIONSHIPS?
   There are lots of reasons of this simple yet complex question. The main reasons include fear of society, being questionable in front of relatives, children from the abuser, financial dependence on intimate partner, no support from parents, fear of death or lack of information about their rights.  
   
   
   Role of Mass Media:
   Half of the mass media or social media which includes televion programs, games, magazines, advertisements, entertainment industry portray violence in different manners which results in increased acceptance and normalization of violence. We all know that we are living in the age of media where we believe everything that media shows. Almost every serial showing domestic violence which effects the mentality of people due to which it has become a normal thing in the society. On the other hand media is also positively portraying this issue. Women through social media take stand for their rights and speak up about domestic violence. Many news channels showing inhuman acts of domestic violence through their news channels. Dramas portraying that how to fight back and stand for yourself.
   
   
   
   How to eradicate this issue from the
   society:
   1.Psychological counselling is very important to overcome domestic violence.
   2. Women should know about their legal rights.

3. Education is necessary.

4. There should be a strict legal action for the abuser.

5. Awareness programs should be arranged on the government level. To sum it all up, domestic violence, in every case is because of the abuser and not the one being abused.